Humble Yourself, Heal Yourself: Life Lessons and Survival Tactics to Overcome Narcissistic and Emotional Abuse

This is a self-healing book about behavioral therapy. It is a personal account of the narcissistic and emotional abuse I experienced from my parents from childhood to adulthood. There are ten chapters depicting specific examples of my trauma and the Life Lessons I learned at the time.

I believe the people who will benefit most from this book are those who are or were the victims of parent-child narcissistic abuse. In my community, we do not discuss or address mental illness or forms of therapy that may contribute to good mental health. The end result is that those toxic patterns of behavior permeate generational lines. This book is for those suffering in silence. Those who are the "strong ones." Those who put on a happy face for the public but are suffering at home. The ones who are successful in their work life but struggling in their personal life. When we fail to recognize that normalizing and rationalizing our abusers' behavior has detrimental effects on our state of mind, we also do not recognize the red flags that show up in our dating lives, work relationships, and friendships. Narcissism is a personality disorder, so it shows up no matter the gender, race, or relationship. Your best defense is to raise your awareness of narcissism and other personality disorders and increase your discernment so that you are prepared for their manipulative attacks. I formulated 35 Survival Tactics based on my life experiences with toxic parents and relatives that have aided in my self-healing journey.

This book will also be useful for those religious persons who have had religion misused to support their abusers. The pivotal point in my life was reading the complete Bible for myself and the realization that God had given both parents and children commandments to abide by. We are taught as young children in church to submit to our parents, but those parents are ones who are honorable, respectable, and emotionally/spiritually mature. Toxic parents are exempt from this category of parents, and are not owed the same loyalty. Disobedience to one's parents is another stigma that has to be challenged. You are entitled to set boundaries with your toxic parents and stand up for yourself when facing abuse. It will save your life!

My book was an act of faith and confirmation of God's purpose and mission for my life. This was an extremely difficult task to sit, recall, and reflect on the emotional abuse inflicted on me from childhood to adulthood at the hands of the people I loved the most. I never had the courage to share my experiences as they were happening, but I realized that my healing came from sharing my experiences. My journey to self-healing led me to the place I am now. God placed it on my heart to share my story of redemption in hopes that it would be an inspiration to those in similar circumstances. I want readers to know that fear of isolation or loneliness is no justification to stay in a toxic relationship. Not everyone you lose is a loss. There is newfound freedom in unburdening yourself from your abuser. Embrace this transformation!

by Laetitia Black, B.A., J.D.

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